Post Surgery Check Up

Today was my post surgery check up.  If you have been following me on Facebook you know things have been a cray-zay!! So just to give you the run down of the last week (can you believe its been a week?) in my life:

• Wednesday-  Surgery at 5ish in the morning, recovery room, a little hallucinations, home, nap, medicine, nap, medicine, nap, Blackfoot to get Hadleigh, soup and rolls at Valeighas, pick up dinner at my parents, home, medicine, bed
• Thursday- sleep in,  shower (lay down in shower, dizzy) nap and medicine about every 4 hours, Jordon rents carpet cleaner, cleans the carpet, dinner with my parents, shaky so come home, medicine, bed
• Friday- Jordon had a flat tire Monday so we get up at 6:30 to drive him to work, migraine hits, drop him off, barely make it home before I see stars, medicine, sleep, Hadleigh watches way too much afternoon T.V,. wake up,migraine, medicine, Pono comes and gets Hadleigh to play, sleep, get up at 7 medicine, start dinner for my starving husband, Hadleigh gets dropped off, Jordon gets home, medicine, bed
• Saturday- Jordon gets picked up, medicine, back to sleep, get up at 10:30, get Hadleigh ready, Dad picks her up(movie with my Mom and Dad) medicine, sleep til 4, migraine, medicine, nap, Hadleigh gets home, Dad brings pizza, Jordon gets home, medicine, rinse body off in tub, sleep
• Sunday-Jordon drives to work, medicine, sleep in til 11, medicine, Hadleigh gets up, cuddles til 12, brush teeth, make breakfast, movies all day, nap, medicine, Jordon gets home, medicine, bed
• Monday-sleep in, medicine, say happy birthday to Jordon!!!( Yay) Jordon and Hadleigh get in the hot tub while I sleep til noon, get up, medicine, shower, get ready, go to Walmart for a birthday printer, go to lunch for his birthday, come home,medicine, relax for a little while, Mom and Dad come over with Jordons presents, Venus and Jeff come over with presents, Hallie and Tedi(love T lots and lots) and other friends come over with cupcakes,migraine, medicine, bed
• Tuesday- Jordon work meeting, medicine, Hads and I sleep in til 11:30!!, make lunch, medicine, Jordon gets home, nap, medicine, go shopping for Jordons birthday clothes, medicine, young womens for an hour, bed
• Wednesday- Jordon school, sleep in, medicine, shower, Dr Appointment, Walmart for Thanksgiving dinner supplies, early dinner, medicine, we nap while Jordon goes to school more, snack, medicine, blog, bed!

It's been a busy week with lots of medicine and sleep. Unfortunately, I will be tired and dizzy and lightheaded until my blood count is back up to normal in a couple months.  After my appt. I started bleeding and cramping more than I had the last 2 days so I haven't been in the best mood and I had to take more pain meds.  I am hoping the dull utuerin pain will go away soon!

Doctor Cox said I look good and that everything is out.  We talked about how I was feeling and what I was thinking about trying to get pregnant again.  I had a break down when we talked about pregnancy again.  He was so kind and I feel bad I started crying!  The idea of sex kinda scares me.  When I'm sleeping I have night mares, flash backs I guess, of the blood coming out and landing all over the floor and toilet.  I can still feel the cramping pain that happened before all the stuff came out.  It was worse than giving birth.  Dr Cox was great at recognizing my anxiety of going to the E.R. again and understood what I was saying.  He said that I have a 95% chance of having a healthy pregnancy and suggested that when I am ready and do get pregnant that he will do early ultrasounds to make sure everything looks good.  That was comforting to hear. 

I don't want to have another miscarriage of course, but what scares me more is everything that happened last week.  The blood loss, the passing out, not being able to feel my hands, going into shock, all the blood tests, all the fluids, hearing the Dr/Nurses saying they want to get blood ready for a transfusion, all the fluids, the emergency surgery, going under aneasthia, hallucinating, the pain.... all of that scares me.  I dunno if I'm being dramatic but I feel like maybe it was traumatic.  I just need to get my head right so I can figure out why it's so scarey.

Jordon has been great through all of this.  So has Hadleigh.  She understands that I'm sick and that she needs to not be so rough with me.  I am so thankful for family that is willing to take her to play so she isn't stuck at home with me.  It helps with my migraines.  It helps with my sleep.  It helps her to get energy out and have fun with family.  I am so thankful that they love her so much.  I am so thankful for the breaks and the love they show me.  That was my week and a few feelings I am dealing with.  Things are getting better.  They just a little more need time to be back to normal.  Love you guys too!